Awesome-ness in the form of my daughter

This song has always made me think of my kids, especially my youngest daughter.

She is such a nut sometimes and I love it because she's not afraid to be 'her'.  She has an album of photos that she made with little messages on them... her feet being the subject of each photo.  This is one that is so fitting of her:

You got me

Okay, Food Lion, please tell me what I'm supposed to do with 80 ounces of ketchup.  You know I can't resist a "buy one, get one free" offer, but we don't even use much ketchup!  At least it won't go bad.  I guess.  It'll sit in my cabinet for a good while, but it won't spoil, right?  Well, I've got some vegan sausages cooking right now, so I'll get going on it tonight.  One ounce down, 79 more to go!

~Diane

Where the Birds Always Sing

An endless sense of soul and an eternity of love
A sweet mother down below and a just father above
For living on in others, in memories and dreams
Is not enough
You want everything
Another world
Where the birds always sing
Another world
Where the sun always shines
Another world
Where nothing ever dies...

~The Cure

Spiral

Spiral

Yay, Me!

I just saved a bird's life.  I think my work here is done.

~Diane

Good advice

My daughter's lunch box lid has a dry erase board inside it (I know, cool, right?), so when I was packing her lunch this morning I saw this piece of advice written:  When life gives you nothing, invent something!

I thought it was pretty funny, but also pretty good advice coming from a kid.

A new day

Yesterday was rough; I don't know what was going on with me.  I could NOT stop thinking about my brother and kept breaking down in tears.  I wish I knew what triggered it because I was not prepared for it at all.  This morning I had Pandora playing in my car, had my Smashing Pumpkins 'station' playing, which plays SP of course, Foo Fighters, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Nirvana, Weezer, etc.  I'm enjoying this the past few days.  Well, right in the middle of all that, I hear "What a Wonderful World" by Louis Armstrong, which just seems completely out of place, but it's a favorite of mine, so I'm singing along like I always do.  Then it dawned on me that maybe it's playing for a reason.  Like, snap out of it girl, your brother may not be alive, but you are and dammit, it IS a wonderful world if you choose to see it and live it.  And the song has more meaning than that to me, but I'll just leave it at that or I'll start sobbing again.  It's a new day and I plan to enjoy it, just as my brother would want me to.  Even if it rains all day again!  Let it frickin rain on me, I'll just play in the mud!  That's what I say now anyway.  Later I might be singing a different tune, but it sounds good, right?  Much better than feeling sorry for myself.

~Diane

Promises

Promises


You've been heavy on my mind more than usual the past week or so. I don't know why; there isn't anything particularly special about this time of year. Maybe it's your oldest niece's upcoming graduation, and how much I wish you could be here for that. You would be so proud of her. But then, you always were. I remind them every now and then how very much you loved them. And you did. You loved them for the amazing kids they are, and simply for being my kids. I can still vividly hear you crying and begging me to not let them ever make the mistakes you made; to not let them turn out like their uncle. I promised you I wouldn't, much like the promise I made to you the day you left home when you again were crying and holding me and begging me to not let 'her' do to me what she did to you. Well, some promises are easier to keep than others, and the promise I made to you about my kids, that one I have kept. I feel you around me at times, and I feel you around the girls keeping them safe the way you tried to keep me safe. My protector, my hero.
That last unanswered phone call... it haunts me... I'm so sorry. I think you know this, because for some reason I could do no wrong in your eyes. But I should've answered the phone. I'd give anything to hear you say, "Hey little sister," one more time.

One more month!!

.... until Harry Potter!!  I can hardly wait, but I will be so sad when it's over.  Just as I was sad when I finished the last book, but I found comfort in knowing I had the movies to look forward to.  But when the last movie is over, it's alllll over with.

There.  My first entry here.


~Diane